Anyway, the following is what I drew:
- Rx 9 of Cups (5 of Cups to clarify)
- Rx 3 of Wands (Rx Hermit)
- 8 of Cups (Rx The Moon)
As soon as I got home last night, I started work on some classwork that needed to get done that took up most of my time last night.
Yesterday morning, a lot of things weren't the way I wanted them to be when I got in to work. It wasn't a fun time. It was partially my fault because I didn't do something the previous day that could have alleviate some of the problems and I felt conflicted and guilty about it. (In the Deviant Moon, the 9 of Cups is literally the wish card. It shows a young moon person astonished on his rear end. In his hand is a genie lamp with a very imposing genie with a third eye. They are on a beach at night with 9 Cups floating around the genie. When the card is reversed, I can see the cups falling to the sand and things are going the opposite way.)
Then in the afternoon it didn't get much better. :( I kind of withdrew within myself, and didn't tell anyone else that I needed help, so it just exacerbated the existing problems. Trying to be stoic and going it alone didn't help at all. (The 3 of Wands shows an expectant mother with a vine from her belly connected to three flower stalks, she's watching over the flower stalks as the Moon nurtures them. When the cards reversed, I can imagine the vine being cut off from the stalks. Lack of teamwork.
Yesterday evening I was so fed up with myself and the job itself. It's a customer service job where sometimes people come in from attitudes and sometimes think that it's okay to vent their frustration out on me. Usually I shrug it off and wonder what got under their skin. However, I had too many of those types come in yesterday. (>_<) By the end of the night, my nerves were wrecked and steam could have been blowing out of my ears. Emotionally it felt like I was just disgusted and through with the job. I don't get much respect, common courtesy, or just dismissed whatsoever. I decided to stop devoting so much of my emotional energy into this job and focus on school instead. It's not worth it. I started this job with low self esteem; however, I think and feel more confident and capable than before. (The 8 of Cups shows a moon woman in a gorgeous red dress with her hands up and walking away from 8 cups on tombstones. The look on her face is one of disgust.)